Wow. What a roller coaster lately. Up down, up down, BIG turn left, BIG turn right, up down... I would like to frame this roller coaster a bit. Work is turbulent. It's not the defining factor in my life so I defer to speaking about newer personal activities.
Karen - New Webster's dictionary defines Karen and a definitely beautiful proper noun who is a woman I met on Chemistry (Match.com's spin off website). My philosophy is that if I can do it online (including Christmas shopping), I will. And online dating is no different. The only reason I met Karen is that my interest and membership subscription to online dating decayed and expired. It was only after I got the online bill for a renewed membership with Chemistry that I decided to negotiate with them for another three months. Here I was on the phone with Chemistry.com support telling them I didn't want to renew and that they should have ethically told me before they recharged my credit card and I decided if I could get their introductory rate, I would give it a shot. To my surprise the gentleman on the phone gave me my original three month subscription price. What a deal. I hope I don't have to renew, but if it comes up again, I'll be sure to use this tactic.
Ok. Back to business. Karen.
One of the few women on Chemistry that perked my interest. Her profile for my own personal posterity...
| "Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he [or she] learned in school." Albert Einstein |
 |
| I’m a scientist looking for a kindred spirit. My characteristics: I am determined, for sure, as is essential for the kind of work I do...And a little idealistic - which means I still think that what I end up doing will help make the world a better place. I tend to delve deeply into things, wanting to know exactly how they work. A true reductionist. On the macroscopic level, I enjoy learning new things and exploring new places, seeing independent films, good food, and thoughtful conversation on almost any topic. I am often drawn to people who are passionate about things I'm not, people who are direct and honest, and independent thinkers. I’m partial to the kind of guy who is mature enough to handle a professional career but who endeavors to lead the unconventional life. |
|
| How you two click... According to Dr. Helen Fisher our Chief Scientific Advisor Naturally easy to get along with, you’ll find each other engaging, insightful and caring. Your conversations will be deep and meaningful. You’re both looking for an intense romantic bond too, and will be able to faithfully maintain it. You: Negotiator / Director Her: Negotiator / Director |
| More About Karen | |||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||
| Her Interests Include | Her Lifestyle and Background | ||||||||||||
| Books/reading, Camping, Cooking, Dining out, Gardening/landscaping, Hobbies/crafts, Movies, Museums and galleries, Music , Dancing, Performing arts, Playing cards/board games, Playing sports, Political interests, Shopping/antiques, Travel , Volunteering, Watching sports, Wine tasting, Fitness, Photography: |
| ||||||||||||
| |||
| Her Lifestyle and Future | |||
| Smokes: | Not at all | ||
| Drinks: | Every once in a while | ||
| Income: | I'd prefer to share this information with my matches later. | ||
| Living situation: | Live alone, Live with pets | ||
| Has children: | No | ||
| Wants children: | Maybe | ||
| About her religious background: | Details not provided | ||
| Describe a book, movie, concert or play that you recently enjoyed.: | Saw a Sinatra musical review recently and really enjoyed it. | ||
| |||
| About Her Match | |||
| |||
| Height: | 5'6" to 7'0" | ||
| Body type: | Slender, About average, Athletic/toned | ||
| Ethnic background: | No Preference | ||
| Religious affiliation: | No Preference | ||
| Education level: | Graduate or professional degree, PhD / Post Doctoral | ||
| Smoking frequency: | Not at all | ||
| Drinking frequency: | Every once in a while, A few times a week | ||
| |||
---------------------------------------------
Ok. So I don't fit her requirements 100% but I decided to go with it. First off, I don't have a "Graduate or professional degree" and I certainly don't have a "PhD / Post Doctoral".
I decided to show interest anyway. She returned the interest and we exchanged a few brief short Q&A requirements on a sliding scale from 1 -10 on how things were important or unimportant to each of us for a partner. We matched almost 95% on everything but cleanliness and fashion. I don't really care about fashion or cleanliness on the macroscopic level because both can be fixed rather quickly by simply cleaning or just going to the mall. Don't get me wrong, my house is rather clean lately and my fashion is passable but I am no slave to how I should be looking (and I had already defined that fact with my profile text of speaking about flip-flops).
I was rather fond of her "true reductionist" statement above and as such, I have highlighted it in bold (go head go back up and look, I'll wait.) I thought this statement resonated well with my simplicity statement in my personal profile.
Ok. Now that you're back. We went out for our first date in Palo Alto. I thought it went rather well but the closer we got to the end of the night the further she got with her emotions and expressions. When we got to her car, it was like cold concrete. She made no indication that she would like to see me again or gave any indications that a kiss (too early), hug (could be ok) or[farewell] handshake were in order. I was clueless. I drove home and texted her that I had a great time so we should have no ambiguity that I had a great time. No response. Oh well, I thought. At least I had a great time. Next morning I was slightly bummed out. Ok, maybe more than slightly. I tried my best not to let it get to me. I had already bought tickets for a Giants game just in case a second date may happen and I wasn't sure it would but better to be well prepared than ill prepared.
To my surprise the next evening, I received an email from her asking if we could go out for dinner next week. What luck! I responded with the fact that I had tickets to the Giants game on Monday and if it was ok with her that I'd like to take her. I also provided two alternative restaurants for her selection in case she couldn't make the game. She responded to my request a day later on Saturday morning. I was excited to know she COULD make the game AND was interested in dinner in case the tickets were already accounted for. I was very very excited.
We ended up deciding on going to the game on Monday evening and had a great time. A few highlights of the night were they conversations about what kind of beer I liked and I tried my best to explain the difference between a beer snob and a beer geek. I think my explanation stuck. For the record, I drank a Budweiser that night because we were already in line for hamburgers and that was all they served. I told her that I hadn't met a beer I didn't like, which is true, but I do have my preference for other beers. I just didn't feel like seeming difficult on our second date (more on this later from her perspective). The game went well. We lost but I won. She asked me to walk her back to her car and I told her that I had already factored that into the equation (because I had). She seems excited that I was so eager to walk her back to her car even though I would miss the next train home. On the way back to the parking garage where she parked I told her that I would love to see her again. She seemed excited about seeing me again and when we got into her car (after she suggested that she drop me closer to the train station) I mentioned that we should do a CD swap on our next encounter. She seems to think this would be a good idea. I was impressed that she could drive a stick shift and even more relieved to see she drove a modest car. I suggested she drop me off close to the station but I could walk the rest of the way so she wouldn't have to deal with traffic. She agreed but as we got closer to the station she decided it would be more effortless to drop me off at the station. She pulled over a block from the station and I opened the door to the car. I turned to her to thank her for the night and ride and the moment felt right. I reached over with my right hand and caressed her right cheek while pulling her cheek that was covered with hair close to my mouth for a kiss on the cheek. Wow. That was nice. I felt it was a good physical ice-breaker and it needed to be done to tell her that I had a great time. Plus I had a captive audience...:D
She left and headed towards the highway. The traffic was bad so I got to wave at her as she passed me only after I had already crossed the intersection. I left for home on the train. The time between I arrived at the train station and when I got home is another future blog post if I have time. I texted her to say that i had a wonderful time and she almost immediately texted me back to say that she did too. This was a delightful change.
The next day at work , everyone said that I was glowing. Two people said I had a smile like the Cheshire cat. TWO Cheshire cat references. I suppose this is only further proof that I wear my heart on my sleeve. I decided to wait all of one day before calling her up to ask her for dinner or SFMOMA the next evening. Unfortunately, my phone decided to run out of batteries mid-voicemail and I thought it would be bad form to call back again so I simply write an email message asking if she would still like to go to dinner and/or SFMOMA. She emailed to say that she had been to MOMA recently but would love my artistic perspective on the matter. I followed up with an email to say I would be just as happy seeing the Tut exhibit at de Young's. She responded saying that she really wanted to go to MOMA with me. How could I argue? :D
Later in the week she called to chat and check up on the MOMA trip. I was hoping to hear her mention a possible dinner date on Friday so I thought I would wait for her to bring it up, and if she didn't I certainly would have. She beat me to the punch. We decided on dinner on Friday at Gombei in San Jose. Fast forward to Friday.
She was 15 minutes late but that was OK by me. She did call to tell me she was running late and I texted her to tell her that she shouldn't rush if she didn't need to, my evening was all hers. I waited for her at the coffee shop next door sipping tea. She got a bit lost on the way and called me to let me know she was having problems finding the place. I gave her directions and soon enough she was whizzing by me in her car to find parking. I waved at her as she passed by. We finally had dinner and it was good. We had nice smooth conversation at dinner and left satisfied with the food,service and of course the company. More to write later. This blog entry is incomplete.
